I never expected to become a Madden widow, but apparently this is my life now.
Somewhere along the way, my boyfriend didn’t just join a Madden league. He joined the actual NFL. At least that’s what it looks like from where I’m sitting.
He is consumed with player assessments, stat lines, draft picks, skews, workouts, matchups, ratings, depth charts and approximately 47 other things I did not know existed before this league entered our lives.
I used to occasionally wonder what he was thinking.
Now I know.
He’s thinking about his secondary.
The amount of time this guy spends on Madden would suggest he is either coaching an actual NFL franchise or preparing for the most important job interview of his life. There are spreadsheets. There are evaluations. There are discussions. There are strategies. There is apparently a very serious process for determining whether some virtual 23-year-old defensive tackle deserves a place on his team.
And somehow, I now know the difference between a free safety and a strong safety.
I did not ask for this education.
At this point, I’m pretty sure if I disappeared for three days, he’d eventually notice—probably right after he finished evaluating his next draft pick.
But here’s the thing: I actually love it.
Because when his team wins, I get to see that ridiculously happy, excited face. He gets genuinely excited. And honestly, it’s pretty damn cute.
So yes, I am officially a Madden widow. I have accepted my fate.
I will continue to support “his team”, listen to conversations about players I have never heard of, pretend I understand what a “skew” is, and occasionally remind him that there is, in fact, a real woman sitting next to him.
To the Madden husbands, boyfriends, partners and league members:
I see you. I support your passion. I just have one question…
Is there an offseason for this thing?
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